Well, it has started. So far up until this point I have only gone through the thoughts and feelings of moving in my head. I had not yet let my heart feel anything until now. Watching my kids play with their friends this week has been hard. I have realized what good, life-long friends they have made here in NC in such a short time. How close they are to these people and how hard it will be to be without them in IN. I have also realized what these mothers have meant to me as well. Finding spiritually mature, like-minded women who serve their families much the same as I serve mine is so essential in the everyday journey of life. I love these people and have leaned on them when I have had no family around to depend upon. They have encouraged me and loved my family without expecting anything in return. How could I possibly find such dear friends again?
I had to have some conversations with my daughters about this. I listened to the words coming out of my mouth and realized that I was doubting my own advice. Did I really believe what I was telling them? I reminded the girls that when we left TN we thought we would never again have the kind of friends that we had there. It was so hard for them to leave their best friends! We prayed each night that the Lord would give them good friends in NC and that things would be even better than they could imagine. I told them that the Lord answered our prayers. Now our job was to pray that God would give us friends in IN and prepare our hearts to receive them. True friends are ones that you never lose - you just make more in other places. I joked around with the girls that they already have bridesmaids for their future weddings, friends for a lifetime. That finally brought a laugh from us all.
Isn't is funny how God gives us children to teach and remind us of things for ourselves. I feel blessed to have so many wonderful friends in life. They all have such a special meaning to me. But I cried myself to sleep the other night, realizing that I was leaving some precious people behind once again. I feel experienced in this department now. I know the pain that is to come and I guess I started going through the emotions a little early this time. I am not looking forward to the day of departure - might cry a little longer this time. Not because I will miss NC more than I miss TN, I think your heart just aches a little more each time.
You can pray for my attitude. I want to be positive. I miss my husband and I want us to be a family together again. I feel bad that he is there alone - anxious for our arrival but that I dread losing the things I will leave behind.
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I will rejoice and be glad in your steadfast love, because you have seen my affliction; you have known the distress of my soul, and you have not delivered me into the hand of the enemy; you have set my feet in a broad place. Psalm 31:7-8
He hears your cries, He knows your heart and He loves you. You have touched so many lives here in NC and you will be blessed in IN. I KNOW, without a doubt, He will provide you with wonderful friends in IN. I can't imagine the uncertainties and sadness that you are facing, but HE does. He will carry you through all the way. I love you, Dear Friend. I miss you already!
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